I swear I haven't forgot to update.

 Since my last update not much has really changed. Except life has gotten busier it seems. 

As a family we have dealt with both our cars breaking down and have replaced one of them. Going from a two car family to a one car family has been an adjustment.But with each car breaking down I was reminded how big and wonderful our circle of friends are here in Oklahoma. We are preparing for Summer break and have just been doing the day to day things we have done since moving to Oklahoma 6 years ago. ( I know crazy to think we have been here that long.) 

B is almost done with 7th grade. Summer break starts Friday. He is looking forward to church camp and being able to see our Indiana family this summer. He is still just as funny, kind and considerate as he has always been there has just been a splash of teen rebellion/sass added to his personality. 

K is doing well at work. He got orders to go to Korea again so that is happening before the end of the Summer. B and I have done this 3 times before so it will be okay after an adjustment period. 

I am still looking for a job in ministry and hope a door will open soon for me in the local area. A dear friend and I are planning a fun new adventure more information on it will come soon. I don't want to spill the beans when we are still in the planning stages. Over all outside of running here and there for B and just life not much is new with me. 

T is still with us and is doing well with being alone for short amounts of time. T is a very social pup and likes to be with people as much as possible. 

It has been a while....

So it has been a good long while since I posted anything. Life got super busy and while it hasn't slowed down much I have time to update you.

Since I last posted many things have happened. 

Let's start with B. He is now a 7th grader and 13 it is crazy to think that my youngest little bug is now a teeanager. He loves playing on his xbox and learning about rocks and is currently  working on learning how to code and do animations. Last I heard he wanted to become a geologist and profession gamer. But we will see what 2025 will bring us. He is excelling in ABA and has met goal after goal in the last 2 years. ANd is doing well in school He is very close to having a C average but is doing his best so that is all we can ask for. He has several close friends not only locally but long distance also. ( P quad ,Teagan, Jalyn and Logan we miss you all) 

Now for K. After returning from  from a 9 month rotation to Korea he was sent back to the training unit that he was assigned to when we first moved here in 2019. The last 2 years has been a never ending stream of guiding and leading new soldiers while he teaches them to do the job they signed up to do. K was promoted to Sergeant First Class this last January and at his pinning his then First sergeant said he had the makings of a future first sergeant. He continues to not only achieve his career goals but he has surpassed them. 

As for little ole me. I graduated with my B.S. in Religion with a minor in Christian ministries in Aug of 2023. Graduating with a BS had been a goal of mine since I was in middle school. I hope to use this degree to guide , encourage and mentor women through ministry. As of right now I am still on the job hunt but I know God has a plan for me and when the time is right the right door will open up for me. 

As a family we have explored our local area and have ventured out of our comfort zone by doing 1 new thing every few months.  We volunteer weekly and try to show those around us the grace and love of God in our daily actions and lives. 

Rip Ebony Louise (Apr 2010-Oct 2024)

It is OKAY to break sometimes (for you too Mama)

 Today has been a day already. Man oh man has it been a day. Here I am sitting in my favorite local coffee shop enjoying the sounds of the conversations and movement around me. But I keep thinking about what I was doing 10 minutes before I decided I was coming here. 

This morning started like our mornings normally do B is fighting his morning routine and K is getting ready for work so I was left with the job of fighting the parental fight alone. B called me a bad mom and was telling me how I suck because I refused to allow TV time until he was ready for school. Same old thing I deal with every morning and I can usually handle it but after the verbal assault I got last night on top of still recovering from getting my tonsils removed and a cold I didn't have as much patience as I normally do. 

I yelled at my kid to get over it and to follow the dang rules. I am so tired and so over being the thing that has to carry the weight all the time. Unlike the sister in Encanto I do NOT have unnatural magical strength. I may seem like I can move mountains and carry 6 donkeys but I can't I am an ordinary woman who needs to breath, cry and throw a fit sometimes. After I yelled, I walked out of the room and cried. Causing K to pause to ask what's up to which I responded with tears still falling have you not been paying any attention to what has been happening? I could seriously use help. Instead of allowing your son to walk by you or to watch TV in the morning back me up and fight the fight to keep him on task PLEASE. 

I am not proud that I snapped I am not proud that I essential shamed my husband into helping parent his son. I am especially not proud that instead of saying hey hun can you help me before I broke I kept going until I had no choice because I failed. Once I stopped crying I took B in my arms and reminded him how much I love him and I love being his Mommoo. I also apologized to both my guys for snapping. We redirected the rest of our morning to a more positive directions and carried on. 

I write this now to show that it is okay to break as a mother. As long as you work hard to correct things and to show your kids that even though Mom broke she loves and is still going to be there. Mom's have feelings and emotions that are sometimes bigger than we can contain just like our littles have. We can't be afraid to let our child see us display them. Especially when it can be done before we break. How are we to expect our children to have a healthy relationship with their emotions and feelings if we haven't modeled what that should look like. As well as modeling that when our emotions get to be to big and we mess up how to properly handle that fall out. 

On my way here to the coffee shop I was listening to K love and a new ( too me ) song was on and it was like a prayer. In the moment I was half listening but since being here in my home away from home I keep replaying the beginning verse. (below is that song), God knows what my heart and headed needed in that moment and sent a simple song to remind me to simply pray in the moment. 

https://youtu.be/wKNYJz2593E

It has been a year....

 It has been a year... For everyone. If I could some up the last year in one would it would be WOW. 

Seriously this last year has had so much happen in the world and most of it I feel could have been prevented with common courtesies  and respect for our fellow humans . But as a whole the human race has became so broken we forget that we are not they only ones how have feelings, thoughts, and flaws. We as a whole are so quick to judge and point fingers with out the facts or very little information. We as a whole are so broken we forget that we are forgiven and saved from all this worldly stuff. 

With that said in my little world that consist of my Snider boys and I, here is how 2020 until know looked. 

We are still in Ok. As a family we have found a wonderful church family that are supportive and everything we missed from our chapel family from Va. We have been staying safe during the pandemic and trying to grow as a family in the areas we fall short.

B saw all his neighborhood friends move away this summer and has struggled to find new ones. But things are looking in in the form of a fellow class mate who is also Autistic. B at first said he scared him because he made a lot of noises that B did not understand but after I urged him to find out why this kid was doing it and help if he needed it they have became great friends and wonderfully supportive of each other. B recently was heard a teacher say the fellow student had Autism like B which made B feel even less alone among his peers. ABA is doing it's wonderful magic for B we have moments where we struggle as behaviors become a thing of the past but over all B is doing wonderful. 

K is well he completed several duties and one schooling this last year. He recently switched Brigades and will be prepping for another trip overseas in the future. This time thankfully not for as long as before. 

I have been doing what I do. Holding down the fort while battling with chronic illness and being the caregiver to a very special little guy. I have recently stepped up and excepted a volunteer leadership position with our church. Which I am hoping will help me on the path to where I think Gad is trying to take me. I have also found amazing groups of women who I can lean on during times where I am not my best self. They encourage and push me to do/be better.  I am working with yet another doctor to get my health and weight issues under control.

2020 has been interesting so far.

2020 has been interesting so far.

Not much has really changed in our day to day in terms of what my Snider boys and I do. But in terms of what this year has thrown our way.

K is busier than ever at work and he is enjoying most every moment of it. He is trying hard to get things fixed information wise to submit for a promotion. And he as an instructor deals with many unexpected things daily. Many of the things he deals with are things that often have me shaking my head and wondering why or did their mothers really allow them to live like this?
Recently with all the COVID stuff he is still doing what his "mission" states he should daily which is teach the next class MLRS crew members and what ever else was place on his docket for the day by leadership.

B is no longer in OT he was discharged 2 weeks ago because he has met all his goals!!!! I am so proud of how hard my littlemr. has worked in less than a year. He also reads more and I can honestly say I think that is due to his amazing teacher. With out her this school year we would have been sunk. She has encouraged him in was no teacher ever had before. He still goes to ABA 3 times a week and we as a family are still struggling with his frustration and anger outbursts when his feelings become bigger than he can express or he gets overwhelmed. But things are slowly improving there also. Over the last year he has had 5 of his neighborhood friends move away and 1 that is moving this summer leaving him a lone ranger for bit since he is the only boy left in his 6 house perimeter. He has taken all the changes due to the moves and COVID in stride. Even though he is struggling he still has the courage and faith that has made me so proud of him everyday.

As for me, I am currently taking each goal for 2020 and trying to mark them off one at a time. I am 1/3 of the way to accomplishing 1/3 of my goals. Which is better than I was at this point in 2019.  I am working to get B back on a routine that will work for him so that he can/will accomplish his academic goals. And helping K when possible to accomplish his professional goals. On on personal side I have found a group of ladies that I enjoy spending time with here. Thanks to Fellowship groups through Church and PWOC. I am also currently the SFRG leader for K's btry. I am dealing with my on going mental and physical health issues as they come day to day. And rejoice in the days like today where I am able to do things like clean my home, write this post and play tag with B.

We  have gained a new furry member  to our family. Her name is Tippy  (I call her TT because she like to climb to the tippy top of things when ever possible). She is a lab mix and fit into our little family right from the start.

2020 Let's try this again, again

Let's try this again seems to be the motto of 2020. As I refocus on ME and self care. Not only so I can be a better version of Myself but so I can ultimately be a better mother and wife for B and K. They deserve me at my best right.

They don't deserve the sub par version I have been giving them each day that just gets by and goes through the motions. So now that we are 1/2 way into January I can safely say I am pretty certain that I have my 2020 goals set. And are will to share them with you. Now please note some are more detailed and some are general/boring ones but these are all things that will help me grow by the end of 2020.

My Personal Goals for this year are.

1) to read 20 books this year
2) To do 1 Random act of Kindness daily ( even if it just saying hello to a stranger or holding a door open for someone)
3) Journal daily( written or photo)
4) COOK more ( I LOVE to cook)
5) Volunteer
6) Bed by 1030pm
7) lose 20-25 lbs
8)Stick to a Routine
9) Wake up before B
10) To strength train ( Hopefully with an actual trainer)
11) work out at least 3x a week

My goals for our family/ my relationships this year are
1) Save $1000
2) stick to the budget
3) More date nights/days with K
4) More Family "trips" ( to local places)
5) Dates w/ B ( alone with both K & I through out the year)
6) Declutter the excess from our home
and to
7) celebrate 10 years of marriage in "style" (LOL)
8) Go "HOME" to see family at least once

Now that is 19 things I would like to do this year. A few are dependent on my health and if it continues to remain where it is at or improves this year. Others are dependent on well my husband and if his work schedule will send him to training or keep him away for what ever reason.

Here's hoping I can accomplish 95% of these goals in 2020.

Just a Little Update

So I started seeing a Nutritionist in May. She has suggested that my last medical teams has had their heads up their rears for far too long and that I need to start taking some things from my last 3 labs mare serious than they let on. She also has suggested that I may be insulin resistant or have PCOS which is or could be the cause of many of my medical issues like my weight and migraines. 

Well after June's check in went as I aspected which was I ate even more like a rabbit ( less breads and more veggies) and I moved more yet my scale did not move not one once. She suggested that I try eating even LESS calories than I already do and that I eat even fewer carbs. Plus decrease even more my "life saving" caffeine intake.
SO to give her advice a good running try I am now 
on day 9 of bare minimal caffeine. This means I have only had 8oz of a caffeine containing beverage every other day so that I do not get a massive withdraw headache. BUT I am also still decreasing my beloved carbs (the breads and pastas even more they are basic non excitant at this point) and I am attempting to decrease my added sugar intake also. Here is to hoping all this not only helps the scale go down. but also helps some of my other health issues improve.

On top of seeing someone to help get my weight under control, I have started practicing daily mediation and mindfulness. It is my attempt at trying to continue some of the stuff my former therapist instilled in me since I have not been able to locate the right person to "replace" her  since we moved here. So far I have found that 5-10 minutes every morning seems to set my day off on the right path and if I become to stressed I can pause and tack a few moments and get back on track. My Boys have learned if the hear waves from the app I use or if I am still with my eyes closed I am not going to respond so wait a few and try again.

I need really need  floor pillow or a thick yoga mat my armchair is not the best place to cris cross applesauce in. (lol)


Now if you are still with me My Snider boys have had a lot happen in the last week. 

MrSnider has been in class getting certified to be an instructor for the incoming trainees for his MOS. As of today he has passed the course and now has to pass one more step before he can officially began teaching the new guys and gals for his field. 

LittleMr. is busy as always. He recently got approved for ABA and OT. We will be stating OT next week and ABA is pending the paperwork arriving back to them. LittleMr. also thinks about and misses his loved ones in IN,VA, and NC everyday. (Some more than others but all are in his heart frequently). His NC Girl friend is definitely a topic of discussion with the neighborhood girls who like him and are upset he is "taken". (Don't worry he knows I mentioned her, He told me too). 

We as a family are doing the summer reading program and are excited to explore the history around us this summer. If you are reading this and know the area around us in OK please let us know of some fun and if possible historical things to do. We will drive up if needed to a little bit also.