AHHHH

AHHHH,

So much has happened in the last few months it is crazy. My family went from a semi happy family that was all state side to a semi happy family that has one overseas.

We went from a family with ADHD being our biggest worry to a family where Autism is now our world and biggest worry.

You may be wonder what is she talking about or this makes no sense. Well it does to me the one "holding this craziness together" but barely able to hold herself together somedays. 

5 months ago a Doctor confirmed my worst suspensions/worries that my then 5 year old had Autism but the kicker was that she told me that he was a level 2 not high functioning like I had thought he was. Also around that time my husband came up on orders to go overseas which was unexpected but that is the way of the military and what we have to deal with as a military family.

Anyway I held it together through the holidays, getting appointments for ABA, and IEP/504s set up and done. I held it together through the movers coming and loading up my husbands stuff 2 weeks before he left. and when he walked in to the airport just a few days ago to fly to his new post. Where he will be for a year. I have held it together during every meltdown our son has and every bad report given to me from the school who thinks he is fine and does not need "extra" help.

I am honestly barely holding it together through all this. I am the type of person who needs a plan and for that plan not to change much with out notice. and This is 100% NOT the way I saw my life being at all. I never saw myself as the sit at home hold down the fort while my husband fights for freedom kind of gal. I never saw myself taking care of a child who needs my every waking breath to revolve around his every need or his world may metaphorically end because a piece of parsley looked at his mac and cheese from the table 2 rows down. I never saw myself as a stay at home mom. I did not see myself being "homeless" every 2-4 years because the Government reassigned my husband and we have to wait on a house. Hell I saw myself as working full time with the white picket fence in my hometown with 2 kids and a dog.

SO if you made it this far thank you for reading my rumbling. I will try to have more of a planned entry next time.